Tuesday, November 02, 2004

If Latigo Flint Had Been There

Cliffhanger would have been much shorter if Latigo Flint had been there. Stallone and Rooker would have been out there climbing the mountain and then the bad guys looking for the money would have come along and Lithgow would have been all to Stallone:

"You, climb and get the money or I'll kill your friend - now FETCH!"

And Rooker would have been all like:

"No Gabe don't do it, forget about me."

And Stallone would have been all like:

"Yo Hal, I gots to do it arrrrgh."

And then Stallone would have taken off his shirt and started to climb but then I'd step out from behind a boulder with my iron strapped and squinty eyes and I'd have said in a low cruel voice:

"Hey Lithgow, you should have let them dance."

And Lithgow would open and close his mouth a bunch of times all surprised, then he'd start to raise his machine gun but with a blur my six guns would suddenly be in my hands and a storm of lead would cut deadly trails through the cold Rocky Mountain air.

Then Stallone, Rooker and I would watch their corpses slide away down the mountain, deep red streaks upon fresh white snow marking their way.

"You should have stuck to bobsledding Leon." I'd softly say then we'd turn and go back to the ranger station where Jesse would have hot coco waiting.


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